Can’t Keep Silent

Can’t Keep Silent

I’m supposed to be writing a short paper for an independent study that I’m taking on the Pastoral Letters…Reading about how women were to “learn in silence with full submission” (1 Timothy 2:11) and not “teach or to have authority over a man; she is to keep silent” (verse 12).

I can’t keep silent.

The news of today’s explosions at the Boston Marathon hit me straight to the heart. I am a runner. The Boston Marathon is such a special event, like the Super Bowl of running. All the preparation and training, the hard work and dedication…What should have been such a joyous day, filled with amazing accomplishments, has been eclipsed by what may yet be another act of violence.

It also hits straight to the heart when I read that one of the victims was an 8-year-old child.

At work today, there was a sweet little girl, wearing a purple coat and sparkly, purple hat. I made conversation with her and her aunt. I complimented the color of her outfit, mentioning that purple is one of my favorite colors. So is hers, as well as pink. Same with me. They were going to make blueberry muffins. Sharing in a joyful conversation with them, and then this sweet girl smiled and shared her name with me: Evie Grace. It chokes me up, thinking about how someone could even consider hurting people they don’t know…Innocent people…Children.

I have not yet been blessed to have children of my own…I hope someday. Then, to see the harm that we can do to one another breaks my heart.

Why do things like this continue to happen? I don’t know…We don’t have all the answers. We live in a broken world, as broken people…To imagine a world where everyone would use their power, time, and energy for good would be like heaven on earth.

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me” (Matthew 19:14, NRSV). Right now, I see myself as one of those children, coming to the open arms of Christ, seeking comfort and peace. Truth be told, there are no safer arms to be in.

I had such joy in my heart with what was a wonderful, amazing, blessed weekend. Today my heart aches.

Good and evil, hills and valleys, warm fuzzies and cold pricklies…Life is full of all of it.

Evil, though, does not get the final say. Death does not win. Hope trumps despair. Love and light overcome hate and darkness. It may seem dark right now, and maybe we need to journey through that for a time. May we remember that behind the clouds, the sun still shines. The sun is there. God is with us in the hurt…God was there at the explosions, with all those impacted by what happened. God’s heart breaks as do our hearts. Christ is present in the actions of the first responders and helpers. May we be encouraged that for every malicious act that happens, the helpers way outnumber them, the good overtakes the bad.

We pray for the hurt, the injured, the dead, the mourners, the helpers, and, yes, even the perpetrators…Pray for all impacted. We pray as Christ taught us to pray, in the words of “The Lord’s Prayer.”

And, the next time I run…Maybe each time I run from here on out…I will remember…Remember those who never had the chance to finish today’s race. Each day truly is a gift. Each opportunity to run, no matter rain, snow, wind…Makes complaining about this winter weather seem so small. Perspective.

May peace fill and surround you…Pray for everyone impacted…Tell and show your loved ones how much you care. May we not keep silent in matters of love.

May Jesus walk with you, holding your hand…And may we hold the hands of one another.

When we come together in the Spirit of love, peace, and unity, then hate, destruction, and discord don’t have a foot to stand on.

“Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don’t be afraid.” ~ Frederick Buechner, Beyond Words

“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it” (John 1:5).

 

Coincidence? Sign? Think Bigger Picture…

Coincidence? Sign? Think Bigger Picture…

   I have always liked the saying that “Coincidences are those instances in which God chooses to remain anonymous.” I have NO idea who first said that…Well, I take that back: I remember John Dye, who played the Angel of Death, Andrew, on CBS’ hit TV show, “Touched by an Angel”…At the peak of the show’s popularity (mid-1990s?), the cast was on “Oprah,” and he had said that. Why I am remembering this, I have no clue…As we know, my brain recalls and retains the most interesting things sometimes. :)

   So, fast forward back to today…At work, I was talking with a customer about school and such, and when he left, another customer said, “After what I overheard, I would love to have a conversation with you sometime.” After a brief exchange, she mentioned something that she did, which is something that I’m interested in doing…So, I would love to have that conversation! And, she also gave up chocolate during Lent…Hmmm, a connection perhaps? :)

   Then, do you ever have those moments when you THINK you recognize someone, but you’re afraid to say anything, in case it ISN’T that person? Well, I took a chance today and said the person’s name…Here, it was who I thought it was! She was in one of my classes last quarter…She said she rarely stops in at the store where I work, to which I said, “Well, I guess you were meant to be here today!” She said now that she knows that I work here, she’s going to stop in more often…How awesome is that? :)

   Coincidence? Sign? Small world? Randomness? Perhaps…I tend to think that it’s a bit of a “bigger picture”…You never know what God may be up to. I love encountering each day with that sense of mystery or miracle…You never know what may happen today or who you will meet…May we hope and dream big. :)

If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.
Henry David Thoreau

 

“Keep on the Sunny Side,” June Carter Cash

“Well there's a dark and a troubled side of life.
There's a bright and a sunny side too.
But if you meet with the darkness and strife,
The sunny side we also may view.

Keep on the sunny side, always on the sunny side,
Keep on the sunny side of life.
It will help us every day, it will brighten all the way,
If we keep on the sunny side of life.

Oh, the storm and its fury broke today,
Crushing hopes that we cherish so dear.
Clouds and storms will in time pass away.
The sun again will shine bright and clear.

Keep on the sunny side, always on the sunny side,
Keep on the sunny side of life.
It will help us every day, it will brighten all the way,
If we'll keep on the sunny side of life.

Let us greet with a song of hope each day.
Though the moments be cloudy or fair.
Let us trust in our Saviour always,
To keep us, every one, in His care.

Keep on the sunny side, always on the sunny side,
Keep on the sunny side of life.
It will help us every day, it will brighten all the way,
If we'll keep on the sunny side of life.

If we'll keep on the sunny side of life.” :)

“You Have A Call…Is It On Hold, Or Will You Answer It?” ~ Sermon from 4/14/2013

“You Have A Call…Is It On Hold, Or Will You Answer It?”

Texts: John 21:1-19; Acts 9:1-20

   Dear friends in Christ, grace and peace to you from the one who is and who was and who is to come, our living Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.

   Ah, smartphones…How many of you have one? I sometimes feel like mine is purposely trying to make me feel…Well, “not” smart. So many buttons, touch screens, apps…When they work, everything is great! When they don’t…They complicate life *that* much more, don’t they? But, what is still the main purpose of a smart“phone?” It’s a “phone.” Used to make and receive calls.

   Now, when people try to call me, I admit, I’m not the most “accessible,” if you will. You may receive my voicemail message…Or maybe my voicemail box is full! When someone calls us, are we too busy to answer the call? Or do we see who’s calling, but we don’t want to be bothered with it right now? Are we too tired? Do we hit the “ignore” button? Do we simply let it go to voicemail? Does it depend on who’s calling? Or, no matter the most inconvenient time or circumstance, do we answer it, like my mom always does? :)

   Guess what? Jesus is calling…You have a call…Is it on hold, or will you answer it?

   Today’s Acts and John readings demonstrate Jesus calling…First, Saul (later known as Paul), who is persecuting Christ followers, has this majestic encounter with Jesus on the road to Damascus. Then Ananias is called to go to Saul, someone who might murder him (“You want me to do what, Lord? We must have a bad connection…”)…Then, the disciples and Peter, who had denied him three times, which may be why Jesus asks him three times, “Simon son of John, [sing] do you love me?” Who knows, maybe Jesus sang it? :) This is the third time Jesus appears to them. And, what are they doing? Are they out spreading the Good News of Christ risen? Nope…They have gone back to the comforts of what they did before encountering Jesus the first time they were called: they’re fishing.

   Now, maybe our own call story isn’t as amazing as Saul’s. Or we haven’t had Jesus physically in his bodily form come to us for the third time, as he did with the disciples. But, do you want to know something? We all have a story.

   I know a story of a woman who, when she was younger, she was very shy and quiet. She had fears and lacked confidence. She was overweight. After graduating college and getting a “9-to-5” job, something happened. Transformations started to occur. She lost weight, after years of struggling with image and esteem. She became more outgoing, enjoying life and people more. And that’s when “the tug” started. God, you want me to do what? Outside sources said it, too: “You would be a great pastor.” She ran from it, because she couldn’t do it. Public speaking was a BIG wall for her. But, the call became more and more intense. You can only run from God for so long. You can run, but you can’t hide. Finally, she decided to join Toastmasters, saying, God, if this is TRULY where you want me to go, I will take the steps to conquer this fear. After she gave her first speech at Toastmasters, something amazing happened: She actually enjoyed it and was good at it. God has a funny sense of humor sometimes.

   Jesus is calling…You have a call…Is it on hold, or will you answer it?

   A challenge for you today is to prayerfully consider what is your story? Do you worry if you have a missed call? That you’ve missed the call from Christ in your life? Well, as we can learn from his encounter with the disciples, Jesus is continually calling us. Jesus doesn’t give up on them nor on us, even when we give up on ourselves or each other. Not even death could keep him away from them! As Christ rose to new life, he wants the same for his disciples. He wants the same for us. Christ seeks them out.

   At work, right before Easter, my manager replaced the burned out light bulbs in our storeroom. The way the light shone from it, it looked like a light coming down from heaven. With the time of year, reminding me of The Ten Commandments, Charleton Heston, Moses and the burning bush, I said, “God is in the storeroom.” My manager said to me, “Now, Caroline, isn’t God everywhere?” Ha ha…Way to put the seminarian in her place. :) I had no clever comeback, except for him to be quiet. :) He’s right, though: God is everywhere. Christ seeks us out.

   Would we recognize Christ? Do we? The disciples didn’t at first (verse 4, “Jesus stood on the beach; but the disciples did not know that it was Jesus”)…Saul, who was persecuting Christians, didn’t…He thought that he was doing “the right thing,” but his zeal was misdirected and destructive. We all have been on wrong paths that have hurt ourselves and others. Maybe it’s stubbornness, blinded by ambitions or selfishness to meet our own needs, addictions, unforgiveness, insecurity, jealousy, bitterness, biases…the list goes on.

   Are we like the disciples, after encountering Christ on Sunday morning, but then go back to the “same old, same old” on Monday? Maybe by Sunday afternoon? Would others see us as people of “The Way,” the people Saul persecuted? At that time, Christian faith was a way of life. People left the safety of home and church to walk the road God had set. Their faith was living and active. And, what is it that we are called to do? To love and be loved. “They will know we are Christians by our love.” That’s how people knew who the followers of Jesus were: by the way they lived. Would people say the same of us today?

   We come here…For renewal, nourishment, and encouragement. We encounter Christ in the Word preached, in the bread and wine of Holy Communion, in community…Out in the world, in the faces of our neighbors. And we are to be as Christ to them, even to those who persecute us. The Lord came to Ananias in a vision, simply saying his name, and Ananias simply replied, “Here I am, Lord.” Do we reply like that? “Here I am, Lord.” And when the Lord tells us to “Get up and go,” do we? Are we scared? No one would fault Ananias for not wanting to go to Saul…This man murdered people like Ananias, simply because of what he believed and how he lived! Or, do we feel like our “get up and go” has “got up and went?” We don’t have the energy for it…The beauty of it, though, is that God is the One doing the work. We are the instrument, like the Lord calls Saul in Acts 9:15. All we have to do is show up. Ananias does. Saul is not only restored but is transformed, becoming Paul, a proclaimer of Christ instead of a persecutor. God may take us to the most unexpected places with unexpected people. To work with our “enemies?” Yup.

   Jesus is calling…You have a call…Is it on hold, or will you answer it?

   The story continues today…God working in and through you and me. All of us. Christ was willing to engage and entrust the ministry to someone like Peter, who denied Christ, or Saul, who persecuted Christians. None of the darkness of our denial or failure to recognize Christ can overcome the light. Christ still calls, feeds, and empowers, yes, even doubters and deniers for the ministry. So, who’s ever doubted and/or denied?

   Last week, Pastor Renita and I spoke about our experiences with doubt. I had mentioned the following I was wrestling with during the week: “Am I really using the gifts that God has given me? Does what I do really matter? Do I truly make a difference? Will anyone know I was here? Am I replaceable?” Well, God has an amazing way of affirming us when we need it. Typically on Saturdays, I work with 17-and-18-year-olds. On Monday, I had a note from one of them in my tip drawer that said: “Caroline :) Just thought I would leave you a note saying how much I really enjoy working with you. You’re always such a happy, positive person and I look up to you! Keep smiling BIG!” I almost cried. No one has said that to me before, that they look up to me.

   Now, it’s not about us, but when we need affirmation, God has a way of doing it. One way is through us to each other. Today, maybe each day this week, offer affirmation to someone. Give thanks to them and their gifts. The smallest act of kindness can make such a BIG difference. :)

   And, may you be affirmed today. Don’t allow doubts and fears to keep you from your call. God loves you and has a call for you. You were created with special gifts and talents. Take some time with God, in prayer, to discern what they might be.

   After all, “If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get out of the Boat.” I’m glad that Monica (Streeper, Pastor Dan’s wife) has taken those steps out of the boat to lead the Tuesday night study on this book by John Ortberg. The book affirms that we all have a calling. We all have a story. None of us are just spare parts. We are all “on a mission from God,” to quote “The Blues Brothers,” as he does.

   When it comes to answering the call, will there be hours of work, lack of wealth and recognition, disappointment and discouragement, people opposing or disapproving of you, false starts and failures? YES! :) But, God has you. God created you, redeemed you, and continues to work in and through you. Nothing can fill the hole that only God can fill. Nothing.

   Are you afraid of failure? Singer Johnny Cash experienced plenty in his lifetime: professional, personal…But, he may have said it best when he said, “You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.”

   The story of call that I shared earlier, if you didn’t figure it out, is the story of my call to become a pastor. And the road has been filled with delays, disappointments, messiness, lots of work and expensive in time and money. But, it’s also been filled with GREAT joy. Joy that only God can give. Now, not everyone is called to be an ordained pastor. But, we all have a call. Is it on hold, or will you answer it?

(Me today, holding a picture of me from my college graduation...13 years ago!)

   We are a priesthood of all believers. We are all ministers. All with different gifts. And, our calls are continuous. We are continually being restored. Paul still struggled, and so do we. We need to ask God to help us breathe life and invitation, not threats and destruction.

   Jesus didn’t say that the whole world should go to church; He said that the church should go to the whole world. I want to close by quoting a song by Steven Curtis Chapman called “Do Everything,” which pretty much sums up our call for each day: “You're picking up toys on the living room floor for the 15th time today / Matching up socks / Sweeping up lost cheerios that got away / You put a baby on your hip / Color on your lips and head out the door…Maybe you're that guy with the suit and tie / Maybe your shirt says your name / You may be hooking up mergers / Cooking up burgers / But at the end of the day / Little stuff / Big stuff / In between stuff / God sees it all the same / While I may not know you / I bet I know you / Wonder sometimes, does it matter at all? / Well let me remind you, it all matters just as long / As you do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you, / Cause he made you / To do / Every little thing that you do / To bring a smile to His face / Tell the story of grace / With every move that you make / And everything you do / Maybe you're sitting in math class / Or maybe on a mission in the Congo / Or maybe you're working at the office / Singing along with the radio / Maybe you're dining at a 5-star / Or feeding orphans in the Myanmar / Anywhere and everywhere that you are / Whatever you do / It all matters / So do what you do / Don't ever forget…” Do everything you do to the glory of the One who made you…Jesus is calling…You have a call…Is it on hold, or will you answer it?

   And now may the peace of God that surpasses all understanding guard our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Amen.

Caroline Harthun

House of Prayer Lutheran Church

8:30am and 10:45am

Sunday, April 14, 2013

"No Doubt? Well…" ~ Sermon from 4/7/2013

No Doubt? Well…

Text: John 20:19-31

   How ironic, with this text, is it that April Fool’s Day was this last Monday? I don’t know about you, but I find myself “more cautious” on that day, not sure what to believe or who to trust. Well, after all, my manager at work hid the coffee to be brewed and the bakery to be stocked on one of my coworkers, and he taped all of the cups together, so if you grabbed one, you grabbed them all. That one was meant for me, but, once again, my coworker ended up being the recipient. Then, my manager tried to convince me that I had agreed to work later…I was almost certain I hadn’t…But then, the seed of doubt crept in, and I started to think, Did I? Alas, I did not. :)

   Doubt…Okay, how many of us have ever experienced it? I believe we encounter and experience it every day, in different shapes and sizes. After announcing this week that Pastor Renita and I would be tag-teaming with our reflections on doubt, wouldn’t you know it, I was bombarded this week! As I prepare to leave my well-known places to go on internship, the following thoughts have run through my mind: Am I really using the gifts that God has given me? Does what I do really matter? Do I truly make a difference? Will anyone know I was here? Am I replaceable? You give some people an inch, they will take a mile to do that…People try to push you out, bringing up past insecurities…Which left me with the question: Why do nice people finish last? Or why do bad things happen to good people? Does it have to be this way?

   You know, I think Thomas gets a bad rap. Corey Lange had found a cartoon, and I think Renita may have posted it on Facebook, where Thomas is refuting the name “Doubting,” because we don’t call Peter, “Denying Peter.” That’s true. And, we even see that Peter and the other disciples had doubts of their own. Last week, it was the women at the empty tomb who proclaimed the Good News of Christ risen. The men didn’t believe the women. Even Peter had doubts…Instead of taking the women at their word, he had to go to the tomb and see for himself. Kind of like Thomas saying in verse 25, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”

   You know, in a previous lifetime, I, too, may have chastised Thomas, like some of the scholars I read. But, as I have journeyed through seminary and life, I find that I am more like Thomas than I thought. I wrestled with doubt when my oldest sister passed away three years ago. We prayed and prayed for physical healing, but it didn’t come. I was let down, hurt, even angry. We hear from some sources that the reason one isn’t healed is because he or she doesn’t have enough faith. NO ONE can tell me that I didn’t have enough hope or faith for healing. We need to beware of “prosperity gospels” that turn God into a “magic genie,” like the one in Aladdin. God is the One Who walks with us, carries us, in the midst of the hurt in this broken world.

   I have wrestled with doubt in regards to internship, others telling you that you cannot restrict to the Twin Cities, even if you have elderly parents. Trust is so hard. Trusting that God is at work in and through the people deciding where we go. Remembering that God has us and is bigger than any committee or situation.

   I have wrestled with doubt in regards to ever getting married. Let’s face it: I’m NOT getting any younger! And the number of men knocking at the door of a female pastor is pretty slim. Maybe God is preparing me and him, but when? Who? If ever? I need evidence! ;) (Or the “Run Like Adam Levine Is Waiting at the Finish Line” running T-shirt that Dean Libby found for me this week. ;) )

   You know, Thomas is actually the brave one, putting to words what may be going on in our own hearts and minds. Would we believe if we saw Christ crucified, to be told he appeared?

   Last week during the sunrise service I had said that “doubt and questions aren’t the opposite of faith but rather an ingredient. Faith isn’t knowledge; it’s a gift, not being able to understand all the mystery of the resurrection but to be inspired to live in hope and believe it’s true.”

   I am a positive person, but I also know that life isn’t always “rainbows, unicorns, and warm fuzzies.” But, just as faith is a gift, I believe my positivity is, too. I can see the bright side in a dark world. My time in the valley isn’t as long as someone else’s. But, I’ve been there. We all have.

   I started my last quarter of school Thursday night, which, even though a LONG time coming, it is still hard to believe. A quote the professor gave was, “The opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty.” It’s okay to ask questions. We don’t have all the answers. We’re human. Jesus, God in flesh, knows that. And he generously offers himself to Thomas. This Gospel is a story of hope and promise, not judgment and reprimand. Jesus comes to him! And Christ comes to us today, in the bread and wine when we come to the table for Holy Communion, and in the faces of our neighbors.

   Where may you be experiencing doubt today? May it lead you to an encounter with our risen Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.

Caroline Harthun

House of Prayer Lutheran Church

8:30am and 10:45am

Sunday, April 7, 2013

 

Me with my "Tag Team Preaching Partner," Renita Eidenschink