From Gluttony to Grace: How Is What Jesus Did on the Cross Important in My Life
Once upon a time, somewhere between my sophomore and junior years in high school, I gained a substantial amount of weight. It was after I took my last required gym class. Exercise had no part in my plans. My love of food never stopped. I was always shy and quiet. I was never popular in school. I did have my group of close friends. I lacked confidence. Amidst the loneliness I felt, I found my comfort in food. Too much of it. Misplaced hunger.
This Lent, we’ve been asking the question, How is what Jesus did on the cross important in our lives? I could go on for days about that. But, the word I want to focus on, why it’s important in my life, is summed up in one word: grace.
Even though the commercials tell us this, Snickers does not really satisfy. Wherever we may go to try to be fed, nothing will truly satisfy except for one: Grace. Accepting God’s grace and then sharing that grace with others.
Sometimes, I’m my harshest critic, finding it easier to give grace to others than accepting it for myself. But how can I give grace to others if I don’t give it to myself? On my own merits, I’m not good enough. I never will be. But as Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (NIV). We are justified by him and his blood. I can’t imagine the heaviness that he felt on the cross.
God loves us and deems us as worthy. Each and every one of us. Accepting that for myself and realizing the need to take care of myself, a year after I graduated from college, I started Weight Watchers and to exercise. When all was said and done, I lost 55 pounds. That’s about ten years ago. I embraced the confidence I was lacking. I enjoyed life more and became more outgoing.
When I think of the cross, I think of grace. When I think of grace, I think of a gift. Something we haven’t earned or deserved. The minute I have to do something for that grace, then it’s no longer a gift, and it becomes something based on a work. We can never earn it. We need to accept it and pay it forward, as a fruit of our faith.
Grace gives the ability to laugh when the world thinks you should be crying. It gives you the ability to dance. It’s freedom. Freedom to be the full person God created you to be. Accept it. Realize it. God loves you as you are, sending Christ to die for us, taking our place on the cross. We don’t have to do anything to achieve that. He’s already done the work. As I always say, I’m no surprise to God. He knew what he was getting with me. And you’re no surprise to Him, either.
In this lifetime, we’re never going to be perfect. Now that doesn’t give us the excuse to do whatever we want: “Well, God’s going to forgive me anyway.” When we truly turn away from sin and turn back to God, “if we confess our sins, God who is faithful and just will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” Any righteousness, goodness that’s in us comes from Him. Because of our faith, we need to extend that grace to others. We need to. After all, Imagine no Christ, no cross…Imagine if God gave us everything we truly deserved?
It’s a terrible feeling when grace is withheld. I worked at a corporate job for 8 ½ years. During my last year there, I saw a good friend of mine, who sat across from me for years, get fired before my very eyes. She was never on warning. She made one mistake, and there was no grace given to her. My manager came by to disconnect her phone, shut off her computer, and grab her purse. I was on a phone call, and all I wanted to do was scream and cry. For the rest of that day—actually, for the entire weekend, as this happened on a Friday—I had a horrible sickness in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t eat much. For quite some time, every day when I went to work, I wondered, Is today the day? Am I next? Worry can only get you so far, as it is misplaced faith. I gave it to God. I may never be good enough in the company’s sight, but I will do my best and give it to God. If that’s not enough for the company, then it is what it is. I am deemed worthy by God through Christ, and that’s what matters most.
I worked there for about another year, when I left on my terms, as they would not be flexible with my school schedule. After 8 ½ years, it hurts when there’s no grace, no flexibility. I was one of very few who left on my own terms. In some places where we may be considered as just a number, we always count as a person with Christ. An opportunity opened for me at Caribou Coffee, so it all worked out.
Coffee…Now there’s something I probably have too much of from time to time, especially working in a coffee shop. Too much of anything is bad for you. Look at the Deadly Sins we’ve covered this Lent: Sloth—Laziness, too much rest versus the opposite side of the spectrum--overworking…Anger—There’s righteous anger versus anger over every little thing. We need to live in that area of balance. Gluttony is misplaced hunger, trying to fill the void that only Christ can fill. Gluttony can be with food, like it was in my case, or you can go in the opposite direction, and it can be over-exercising. We need to ask, What are we using too much of to fill the void that only Christ can fill?
Maybe it’s seeking approval from people. I’ve struggled with this one as well, especially after I lost weight, getting accustomed to this new, outgoing self. Some people take kindness for weakness. No matter what you do, not everyone is going to like you. One of my favorites, singer and actress Reba McEntire, was asked about the formula for success. She didn’t have an answer for that, but she said she did know the quickest route to failure, and that was trying to please everyone.
People may hold grudges, but grace doesn’t. How are we to respond towards people who wrong us or despise us anyway, no matter what we do?
It’s easy to allow such things to get us mad, wanting to get even…Grace doesn’t do that. Revenge only makes the situation worse. Mother Teresa offers a wonderful quote, and it reminds me of the song “Anyway,” by Martina McBride song, which is really beautiful: “People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway. If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
I saw a dear friend on Friday, Tristan, who is actually my hair stylist—I’ve been going to her for ten years now—and told her about a situation I was having with a certain individual, and she put the Mother Teresa quote in simple terms: “Just give ‘em a biscuit.” There will always be people who are jealous of you, despise you, hate you…Just give ‘em a biscuit. Better yet, give them grace. I try to live by the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” and I will continue to do so.
My Uncle Jim passed away on Saint Patrick’s Day, which is appropriate in a way, as he was born on All Saints Day, November 1st. He fought cancer with grace for four years, after being told at that initial diagnosis that he had six months. I never heard him complain about others or talk badly about them. He accepted grace and gave it to others. I never heard him complain about the illness, either. The only thing that would’ve come close was a week and a half before he died, when I hugged him, he said, “I wish I had ten more years.” I did, too.
But because of Christ, the cross, and grace, I know that death is not the end. One day, I will see him again. I will sit next to him on the banks of that heavenly, distant shore, with a fishing pole in each of our hands. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith”…Grace for one, grace for all. Amen.
Caroline Harthun
House of Prayer Lutheran Church - Oakdale, MN
7pm Lenten Service
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
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